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Techniques Tuesdays: 3percent structures (Push Her Off the barrier) | ladies Chase

Do you really keep working to the same arguments? Build frames that circumvent these (while increasing your own chances by 3-5per cent).

I understand a man who constantly battles with chemistry with ladies.

The guy never goes about this kind of stuff just very right. He utilizes all of the right strategies and methods with women, but the guy utilizes them in this way that will be only a little little bit ‘off’.

When you just be sure to point it to him, he claims that actually he or she is performing every little thing correctly. He then states it has to be a problem with the technique or that technique fails for him.

Irrespective the reason why, the guy continuously incurs issues where he has got exactly what he believes is an excellent time, followed by the girl telling him after it (or texting him down the road) that she “seriously isn’t experiencing it.”

“There’s no biochemistry,” she states. Or “I didn’t feel a spark.”

I can not get him to repair the vibe/calibration problems. He does not see these as a real issue, probably because he’s struggling to pick up on this matter himself, even though ladies point it or coaches point it.

But i desired to assist him, thus offered him a device we knew the guy would use: a 3percent framework to aid press things their way in those edge instances when it can get regardless, but “I’m not feeling a spark” will be the determining factor.

What is a 3percent Frame?

There’s a lot of things you can do in a seduction that assist you in small ways that are difficult to assess.

Such as, in the event that you

be considered a girl

on being adventurous and spontaneous, and she afterwards ends up in sleep along with you, exactly how much of these is because of that earlier certification?

Would she still have leaped into bed to you had you perhaps not skilled her as those ideas?

Would she have now been much more resilient without that qualification?

How large a distinction made it happen make?

The fact remains, you will not ever understand. an attraction isn’t some thing you can quantify to get precise figures on.

If absolutely an easy way to work accurate scientific studies at size of specific attraction processes to determine their specific efficacy, i’ven’t viewed it yet.

The majority of seduction is actually having a bunch of small, beneficial activities that lead towards the eventual end result you desire to accomplish.

A 3percent structure is certainly one this type of activity.

Any Variety Of
you can easily follow that somewhat helps your chances with a female is a 3per cent structure.

As an example, for all the man exactly who keeps working into a biochemistry objection, here is the 3% frame I inquired him to start out making use of with ladies:

The present day notion of chemistry is flawed.

Which is all.

Exactly that this weird trope in contemporary rom-coms about needing to find somebody you have got this instantaneous, magical chemistry with, next without having that you should only abandon some one and do not notice that individual once more, is actually defective.

(allow me to simply stop for a moment and say: i’m really a firm believer in

the importance of biochemistry myself

, for my personal lasting interactions at the very least. Nevertheless i’m thrilled to hook-up with a female we lack chemistry with assuming i am if not attracted to their. I also have a tendency to believe

biochemistry is generally created to some extent

. But the ‘chemistry concept is actually flawed’ framework isn’t a-frame we recommended for myself — it’s one we suggested for a man for whom ‘chemistry’ is actually a mythical monster hardly ever encountered)

The guy started initially to make use of the frame, usually by asking women a few questions, like, “What do you consider the present day idea of biochemistry?”

They’d make sure he understands this or that, he then’d state, “I believe like chemistry is something you should grow in the long run as you get to learn some one.”

Essentially 100% of females will go along with that, he says.

Some ladies come correct out and declare that just when he asks all of them their particular thoughts on chemistry, before the guy even says his view of it himself.

Today, does it get him all women? No.

Some women will accept him that biochemistry is one thing that takes time for you establish, then flake on the subsequent go out with him and tell him they simply aren’t feeling it in any event.

But he is obtaining further into interactions now with ladies the guy utilized the ‘modern biochemistry’ framework with, such as women it did not feel like he’d many biochemistry with to start with.

I cannot say just how much a framework similar to this helps — however if it is the right frame, plus it targets an essential reservation females have along with you, and will get out in top from it, we can say it probably gets better things by 3-5%.

How a 3percent Structure Functions

Suppose you’re in addition an individual who struggles with biochemistry.

Let’s imagine you start utilizing the ‘modern chemistry’ structure with ladies.

You consult with females and obtain into conversations the place you talk with all of them exactly how the current concept of biochemistry is actually flawed. They accept you that biochemistry is something that must develop after a while and get nurtured.

How might this frame guide you to?

Well, after a date, a lady goes back and reviews the time went with you.

She reviews just how she felt through the go out, she reviews that which was said (with the level she will bear in mind it), and she operates those through the filter of exactly what she actually is looking and exactly what she wishes.

If she didn’t feel chemistry, and has now few other powerful explanation another out and satisfy you, she is pretty likely to see that and state, “Well, I’m not experiencing it, thus I won’t notice that guy once again.”

If however she did not feel biochemistry, but there are some things she enjoyed in regards to you, and


you chatted to her about biochemistry and she arranged along with you that biochemistry takes some time to build, absolutely a reasonable chance that inside her analysis she claims to herself, “Well, I’m not experiencing it… but i like this hence top-notch their. In which he’s right, chemistry needs time to work to construct. Maybe i will provide this person a chance.”

This is why this structure operates.

Specifically, this structure does it operate

while she’s maybe not to you


Not absolutely all 3percent frames work in this manner. Lots of work whilst woman is actually in-person to you.

For instance:

  • “Be impulsive”
  • “end up being adventurous”
  • “Life’s quick then chances are you perish”
  • “stay an existence with no regrets”
  • “It’s not possible to know something before you’ve tried it”
  • “you come this much, you could and go other way”


They’re 3per cent structures that, like the modern biochemistry frame, probably have actually a broad +3-5% influence on the outcome of your seductions.

But here is the fact:

  • In a lot of seductions, these frames might not actually generate a dent

  • In a number of seductions, these structures can help push this lady around line

  • Various other seductions, these structures is lynchpin minutes

If you should be increasing to intimacy with a lady at the destination, and you hit weight getting her trousers off, and she actually is into the rest but she don’t do that, and you tell this lady, “we have are available this far… we may as well get the rest of the method,” some girls are likely to move their own heads at that, while different ladies exactly who might’ve strolled if not will think it over and state,

he is correct!

in addition to their jeans come zipping off.

A 3per cent frame works by providing a woman something different to take into account that forces this lady in order to make a decision on your side, when she might be lured to go another way.

Where Are You Presently Losing Girls?

Wherever you’re dropping women, whatever typical objections you come across, that’s where you will need to build a 3% frame.

For example, if females hold objecting that you go too quickly, then chances are you really should begin seeding the frame using them that

going quickly

is a great thing.

Like, “do you consider that if a couple are actually into both they need to hold off? Or which they should be together?”

She will provide some arbitrary response, and you will state, “I think that when folks are truly into each other, they should spend time with each other. I believe it really is completely wrong to keep them aside. Whether it’s pet attraction or fate or fate, if two different people tend to be driven together, chances are they should really be collectively.”

You simply set a-frame whereby going quickly with some body you’re interested in is the proper course of action, and never transferring fast is actually ‘keeping you apart’ the other which wrong.

Find where in actuality the speedbumps are in your courtships, and make 3% structures that will help you past them.

Build structures that address arguments before they take place, and point the chances to your benefit.

Alek Rolstad

is a huge proponent of anti-


structures, because he would like to be able to discuss gender and declare himself as a sexpert and then have women come with him designed for gender —

without feeling embarrassed regarding it


And that means you will notice Alek telling women things like, “I think its unfair that men within community may have the maximum amount of gender as they wish and never get judged for this, but if a female provides intercourse she’s a slut.” Every woman agrees with this.

That is a-frame he is setting to circumvent “But I don’t wish men and women to consider I’m a whore!” arguments she may raise later on as he starts going situations across the road to intimacy.

If they can circumvent that objection ahead of time, you can find good probabilities she never brings it, and then he doesn’t have to get out an ASD flame down the road.

Even more instances:

  • If you have difficulties with women telling you they think as you plus they are not suitable, ready a-frame like, “i believe compatibility is something it takes for you personally to get a hold of, as you get to understand some body much better.”

  • If you have difficulties with ladies rushing down and saying they don’t have time, set a-frame like, “it appears as though everyone’s quickly today no one has time for face to face communication. Personally I think like something’s been lost with out busy everyone’s become and how electronic everything is.”

  • If you have issues with women telling you they merely choose bad boys, and you are clearly maybe not a poor man, ready a-frame like, “I feel like every person gets so closed during these stereotypes of what they do and do not such as that they become restricting on their own with no cause.”

  • For those who have difficulties with women telling you they’re merely in search of long-term connections, set a frame like, “i have observed its a lot more difficult locate some thing when you are also concentrated on that. Whereas the individuals who’re most readily useful at locating everything is people who allow things happen organically, and see where circumstances lead.”

You get the drift.

Figure out in which you’re tripping up with women, subsequently put a 3percent structure to help perfect women to a.) not bail once the moment arrives, and b.) end up being much more ready to accept your management and impact for the reason that second.

The 3percent frame don’t win you every lady.

Nevertheless’ll trick circumstances more in your favor with those girls you satisfy who may go anyway, and who this frame or issue is the decider.


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